


Silent Screams

by EmeraldWaves



Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Angst, Drabble, M/M, Prompt Game, When Cloud is all mako-ed out, canon character death, sad fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-27
Updated: 2018-05-27
Packaged: 2019-05-14 11:41:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14768918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmeraldWaves/pseuds/EmeraldWaves
Summary: When Cloud is lost in a white haze, it's Zack's voice that keeps him connected to reality.





	Silent Screams

**Author's Note:**

> A sad angsty drabble I wrote while playing a prompt game with some friends! I've been in such a Cloud mood and this is what came of it XD The prompt was "Hey, I’m with you, okay? Always." <3

So many things are hazy. The world is coated in white smoke and bright lights, his body heavy and aching. The pain is hot and throbbing, coursing through his blood. If he could move his hands, he'd want to scratch his nails down his arms and rip his skin off; peel it away piece by piece, if only to get relief from this pressure. This poison will surely kill him; it's too much for his body.

He's always known he wouldn't make it. His body isn't compatible. He's bound to die. He wants to. At least it would make him lighter, euphoric when the heat and throbbing pain is gone.

But no, somehow he is alive, hanging by some sound in the far distance.

"I got you..."

The sound is a voice. It's one he is so familiar with, one he's heard in so many different ways. It's in the distance of the white haze.

"...-ght Cloud?"

It fades in and out, like a distant memory, hidden in the deepest recess of his mind.

"Cloud!"

Who... why is it impossible to place? It makes him feel so warm, so comfortable, like a blanket of words wrapping around his skin, fighting off the angry heat.

"I got you buddy. I promise."

_Zack._

Cloud wants to scream his name, is desperate to. He wants to cut through the haze with his voice and tell Zack to escape on his own. However, the words get lost in his throat; they can't break through the invisible barrier blocking his throat. He can hear Zack so clearly, the only ounce of clarity he has in his white world of pain.

Nothing is clear but Zack.

But why? And why is Zack here? Or a better question is perhaps why is Cloud with Zack? He needs to run if he's capable. There's no reason for Zack to take Cloud with him. Knowing Zack it's probably because he feels the need to be a hero, embarrassing idiot. He's already Cloud's hero without having to rescue him. He still wishes he could be as cool as Zack, not that he ever will be; he'll never escape this lifeless state.

A hand is on his shoulder. "Hey, I’m with you, okay? Always."

 _No._ Cloud thinks, and through his white haze he sees Zack's bright blue eyes and spiky dark hair. _Why_?

He's useless. Utterly useless. Always has been, always will be. He couldn't even rescue Tifa. No, Cloud is incapable of doing anything remotely useful, so there's no reason for Zack to save him.

But he still does. He's Zack, and being a hero is what he does best.

There are times when Cloud is directly pressed against Zack's back. He's carrying him. He can smell his musky scent, hear the way his boots drag heavily against the ground. Everything around him is so _Zack_ , Cloud can't deny the obvious. He wants to beg Zack to put him down and run. Run away.

"Hey..." Cloud hears Zack's voice, can make out his face among the darker backdrop. Everything still looks so white, but he can see the smile on Zack's pale face. His eyes shimmer with loneliness, and Cloud wants to reach his hand out and touch Zack somewhere, anywhere, just so he knows Cloud is _with_ him and he knows he's not alone.

"...Do you remember when we first met? I know, I know, you can't answer me..."

_I want to!_

"...and who knows if you can even hear me when you're like this."

_I can hear you!_

Zack laughs and the sound is heavenly, so soothing for the pain collecting in his veins. "I probably should stop talking to you, you probably want rest-"

_Please, don't stop. Never stop._

Zack's voice is the only thing keeping him alive.

"But I also am kind of tired right now, and I don't want to fall asleep so I'm going to talk to you. Anyway, the first time we met... man, that mountain was damn cold wasn't it?" Zack laughs again, running his fingers through his messy black hair. "But we handled ourselves better than all of them, us country boys! Do you remember?"

Cloud does, but he has a confession, one he doesn't know how to make. He met Zack a few times before, once in the hallways at Shinra... another time when Zack gave a motivational speech to his squad. He'd seen him around plenty of times, but it wasn't until that particular mission they'd actually talked.

"Kinda silly, but I always thought you were cute, even back then. You looked so beautiful... your blond hair so bright against the white snow."

Cloud wishes he could push him for being so damn embarrassing.

Zack starts talking to him every night, or what Cloud perceives to be every night. It's a little darker when he talks more intimately like this, though the white is constantly threatening to take over his vision. Cloud fights it; fights it to hear Zack's voice.

"You know, I wanted to take you on a date somewhere cool, but you always got so sick whenever you had to travel on moving vehicles, so I didn't want to risk it."

_You should've, I would've survived._

He laughs sadly. "You always looked so miserable. And I wanted you to enjoy our private dates. Hell, I'm probably making you sicker, driving you around like this."

Cloud does wonder where exactly they're going. It's impossible for him to see, but he trusts Zack, relies on him. He won't let anything happen to them.

"You know sometimes when we're just sitting here, me and you, I wanna kiss ya! But then I think that'd probably be weird."

_Do it._

"I mean... I know it's nothing we haven't done before, but with you barely being conscious it feels, uh, a little awkward..."

_No, do it, please!_

Cloud remembers his first kiss with Zack. Together, they had hid down a corridor in the hallways of Shinra. He recalls how rough his hands were, but they were so gentle when they pulled Cloud's cheeks forward, slotting their lips together perfectly. Cloud had kept his eyes open for a moment before realizing they probably should be shut. Zack's lips had caressed his own, and he hadn't meant to let Zack do all the work, but he had been mesmerized by it.

"But then again who knows! Maybe true love’s kiss will break you from this spell!" He laughs so loud at that, his smile pulling across his cheeks. Cloud almost believes his smile will be enough to clear the fog away.

"I do, y'know," he shrugs. "Love you, I mean. I don't know if I ever told you."

He hasn't, but Cloud knows. He knows from the way Zack moves inside of him, and keeps his blue eyes locked on Cloud's when they kiss and make love. Zack is gentle and loving, a tease too sometimes; he loves pulling beautiful sounds from Cloud's lips. He's so kind and generous, how could Cloud _not_ know.

_I love you too..._

And this is how it goes; Zack speaks and Cloud attempts to think as loud as he can, in hopes that Zack might hear him...

The truck rumbles, and he can see Zack's face, but he's having a difficult time hearing his voice. Why? Why can he only hear the sounds of the truck as it rolls over the dirt? There are shouts when the truck comes to a screeching halt, and though Cloud can still only see a vast whiteness, he can sense something is wrong.

Zack's back is the last thing he sees after everything stops moving. His back is rest against something hard, and he sees Zack running away. He tries to scream because he knows; there is no way Zack will come back alive.

Finally, he raises his hand, reaching, hoping to grasp at any part of Zack to stop him, but Zack's already turned around. Far away. He's gone.

The color starts to return to Cloud's world when he hears the massive amount of gunshots. The sky opens up to cry, and he actually feels the water on his skin. His limbs are heavy, his legs incapable of moving.

_Zack!_

He has to see him, he has to.

He pulls his body towards Zack's bleeding form. The red is so bright, soaking into the ground, mingling with the water flowing onto the ground. Of course he can see colors so clearly now, a cruel miracle.

"Zack..." he grunts, his voice hoarse and quiet. He glances down at Zack's face, watching his chest rise and fall sporadically with his labored breathing. Water soaks his hair, droplets falling onto Zack's chest, spreading the blood across his shirt.

"Cloud..." he breathes, his hand rising to cup his cheek. He wants to tell him to save his strength, but Cloud can see the bullet wounds. There are far too many.

He's dying.

_"Hey, I’m with you, okay? Always."_

So much for 'always'... There are so many things he has to say! Zack can't die yet, not like this. He wants to know his story, how he got them this far. He has to thank him for rescuing him! He has to tell him he loves him too...

"You have to live... for both of us."

But how? He tries to listen to every world Zack says, absorb every word his voice speaks; the voice which kept him alive.

"I..." He hates how much his voice hurts, as though he hasn't spoken in decades. He's never been great with words though, so maybe this is a blessing in disguise.

"My honor... my dreams..." He holds out the handle of his sword, Angeal's sword. Cloud knows all about it, Zack's most treasured item.

He can't let him down. Not now. Not after _everything_ Zack has done for him.

Wrapping his hands around the handle of the heavy sword, Cloud bites his lip with determination. He will live. He will. After all Zack's done, how could he not? He has to live for both of them.

"I'm your... living legacy."

Zack's breath stops silently. His world goes white once again.

And Cloud screams.

**Author's Note:**

> I am sorry for writing something that probably already exists a million times LOL! But my friend and I were playing this game and for this prompt I couldn't think of any other moment LOL! it was fun to get some angst drabble out <3 thank you to any one who reads! And thanks to Janie for reading it over! 
> 
> [emeraldwaves](http://emeraldwaves.tumblr.com/) is my tumblr where I take requests  
> [musickazoo](https://twitter.com/musickazoo) is my twitter if you wanna yell about FF with me <3


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